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The One Gift We All Truly Need: Unconditional Love

The holiday season is often described as “the most wonderful time of the year,” but for many of us—especially busy homeschool moms—it’s also one of the most stressful. In the hustle of schedules, shopping, and expectations, it’s easy to lose sight of what truly matters: unconditional love.

In this post, I want to share a powerful lesson that has transformed how I approach the holidays, my family, and myself. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or weighed down by difficult relationships, let this be an encouragement to reset and focus on the gift we all truly need—love that asks for nothing in return.

Unconditional Love for Our Children

Charlotte Mason once said, “Actions speak louder than words to a young heart.” The truth is, our kids crave love and connection more than perfect holidays or Instagram-worthy decorations.

Unconditional love doesn’t mean we excuse bad behavior, but it does mean our children know they are loved on their best and worst days. Simple, intentional moments are what truly matter—like sitting by the fire to read a favorite Christmas book, taking a drive to look at holiday lights, or sharing a quiet cup of cocoa together.

When we slow down to meet them where they are, it communicates to their hearts: “You are loved, no matter what.”

Ask yourself: What’s one small way I can show my child they are unconditionally loved today?

Choosing Kindness in Difficult Relationships

Holidays often mean more time spent with extended family, and not all those relationships are easy. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is this: you can’t control how others behave, but you can control your thoughts about them.

When someone says or does something hurtful, it’s natural to react. But as I shared in my recent Feast Life podcast episode, shifting to the “next kindest thought” can change everything.

Instead of thinking, “Why are they always like this?”, try asking: “I wonder why they’re hurting?” or “What if I show compassion instead?” When we choose empathy, we free ourselves from carrying unnecessary anger or bitterness.

Loving Ourselves: The Missing Piece

One of the hardest places to extend unconditional love is toward ourselves. As moms, we pour so much into our families that we often forget to nourish our own hearts.

John Eldredge’s words resonate deeply here: “The way you treat your own heart is the way you’ll end up treating everyone else’s.”

• Be kind to yourself. If your holiday plans don’t go perfectly, it’s okay. Your family doesn’t need perfection—they need presence.
• Speak gently to your heart. Imagine your younger self standing in front of you. Would you criticize her for being imperfect, or would you give her a hug and remind her she’s doing her best?
• Ask what you need. A quiet walk? A favorite book? Five minutes to sit alone and reset? When you care for yourself, you’re better able to care for those you love.

Protect Your Joy and Energy

No one else has the power to determine how you experience the holidays. You get to decide what thoughts and emotions you carry with you. If someone’s words or behavior try to pull you into frustration, pause and ask yourself:

• “What do I want to feel right now?”
• “How can I bring my most loving, nourishing self to this moment?”

Protecting your energy doesn’t mean ignoring difficult realities; it means refusing to let them steal your joy.

Pause and Reflect

In the busyness of the season, taking just a few moments to pause can reset your heart and mind. Whether it’s jotting down three things you’re grateful for, whispering a short prayer, or closing your eyes for five quiet breaths, those pauses create space for what truly matters:

Love. Grace. Peace.

Final Thoughts: The True Gift of Love

The greatest gift we can give our children, our families, and ourselves this holiday season is unconditional love—the kind that doesn’t demand perfection or performance.

As you move through this season, remember:

• Your kids don’t need a picture-perfect Christmas; they need your presence.
• You can choose love in difficult relationships by shifting your thoughts.
• You are worthy of the same grace and kindness you extend to everyone else.

“To love another person is to see the face of God.”

This holiday, let’s see those around us—and ourselves—through eyes of unconditional love.